Eternity
by Departed
Summary: It was a sudden action, something I had not been expecting, but I relished this ecstatic moment as I pulled myself closer, my heart thundering in the silence. Oneshot, Alice/Bella


**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, or the books, for that matter.**

**Eternity**

I was cold. The water, icy and freezing, was nothing compared to the bitter ache of my heart. It felt empty, not damaged, nor broken to the point of nonexistence, as it was merely a few weeks ago. But just… empty. And for some odd reason, I couldn't conjure up a reason why.

With a quick movement of my numb hand, the knob was turned, and the running fluid easily shifted to hot. I shuddered at the feeling, the steam surrounding me, enveloping me from the world outside.

It felt good. The goose bumps prickling my arms faded within seconds, replaced by a sight of smooth, pale skin. Water dripped from my burning flesh, filling the tub with the blazing fire that sent my nerves flying. I couldn't possibly care.

It was dripping now, the water escaping in single drops while it landed with a light thud. I grabbed the bottle of soap and effortlessly spread the liquid across what seemed like a river that lay ahead of me. With a large intake of air, I held my breath and ducked my head in.

Even with my eyes tightly shut, I still held that image of him. This… Godlike creature, beautiful in every way possible, that I helplessly fell in love with. The smooth edges of his angelic face, and the piercing color of his golden eyes was all it took for my heart to run wild, for my stomach to drop to the floor. And he was mine. All… mine.

So then why did I feel this way? Why did my heart ache whenever I thought of him? Why did I feel so _lifeless, _as if my soul was being drained in the worst way possible?

I felt a painful tug wrench at my lungs, and I immediately resurfaced, despite my desire to do so. Gasping for breath, I began running my hands along my legs, making sure the soap reached every part of my body.

And yet, no matter how much I tried, I could never force this feeling away, this… dirty sensation I had. I held my head back, along with a sob that threatened to escape, and tucked my knees in front of my bare chest.

With a forced tone to my cracking voice, I began humming his lullaby, imagining his arms around me, holding me, touching me. But the feeling never went away.

With my eyes shut once again, I switched to a new song, one that I heard on the radio of his car when he drove me home. The words enchanted me, roamed through my mind until I fell asleep that night in his arms. And since then, I never felt the same.

"You always said you're too clumsy to dance. I never heard anything about singing."

The words to the song came to a halt, and so did my breathing. It wasn't just the mere fact that someone was there while I was bathing. It was _who _that was there.

"Alice." I couldn't move. The shock practically froze me to the tub. "What are-"

"I'm not looking. I swear." The voice said, beautiful, like a melody. "I'll wait in your room. Sorry if I scared you."

My heart skipped a beat, and I immediately rose with a desperate attempt to stop her. She was nowhere to be seen, and I quickly flung my bathrobe over my wet body and ran out the door.

Never was I so happy to see anyone that wasn't Edward, and it frightened me to think of such nonsense. But I knew it was me being honest with myself as soon as I spotted her, sitting motionlessly on my bed.

With a sudden soak of realization, I refrained myself from yelling her name, closing the door behind me so Charlie couldn't hear. I was pretty sure the game wasn't over just yet.

"You have a nice voice, you know," she whispered softly, just loud enough for a human to hear. Or in this case, me.

I felt a blush creep up my cheeks, and I shyly wrapped my robe tighter as I remembered my sudden enthusiasm in the bathroom. "You really think so?"

I caught a glimpse of her nodding, a smile plastered on her lips.

I sighed, unable to feel the slightest bit of embarrassment now that I had some real company… not that I didn't enjoy being with Charlie. "My voice couldn't possibly compare to yours, or any vampire's for that matter."

"Silly girl. I thought you knew by now that vampires could do anything!" She laughed.

I scoffed. "That's not true."

"Uh huh. Then name one thing."

I frowned slightly, unable to think of such a thing. She was… well, perfect. Practically all vampires were. "Your inability to dress me up so I don't look so plain."

I took a seat next to her, holding back a giggle as she made a face. "You're hardly plain, Bella. And for your information, if it weren't for me, you'd be a disaster. When was the last time you took a look in your closet?"

I bit my lower lip to refrain from smiling. How could I be insulted when was she angry like this? It was too adorable. I sighed again, and relaxed my head onto her shoulder, relishing the moment of spending time with someone I loved dearly.

Her petite figure leaned into mine comfortably, and, with a gentle hold, her arm snaked around my waist delicately, as if I were breakable. And it seemed I was. According to Edward, one misplace of a finger and my heart could stop beating.

"I'm sorry," she whispered quietly, after a few moments.

I reluctantly broke away from her comfortable embrace to look at her, a puzzled expression on my face, I'm sure. "For what?"

She shrugged, her shoulders shifting against mine in a way that caused my heart to race. I ignored the heat that made its way to my face. "For saying that," she said, a touch of regret in her tone. "I meant it when I said you aren't plain, Bella. You're exquisite, and you shouldn't think otherwise."

"And you," I replied, poking her in the stomach, though I ended up injuring myself. "Shouldn't be apologizing." I clenched my teeth to refrain from yelling in pain as I examined my finger, which was throbbing and, if it wasn't my imagination, dented… in a way. I growled. "Stupid rock hard vampire."

The sound of her irresistible laugh filled the room, and I couldn't help but frown. It wasn't that funny.

"You're definitely a magnet for danger, aren't you?" She giggled, though I didn't participate. "Really, Bella. Try not to trip over a shoe before tomorrow. We don't have time to take you to the hospital first."

"What's tomorrow?" I asked, my arms still crossed in irritation.

Alice sighed. "You promised me last week that we would go shopping. You can't get out of this one, you know. Even if you didn't remember."

A memory of her begging for this shopping trip filled my mind, and I groaned. I didn't reply. I was still angry at her clumsy jokes.

"Edward will be gone for the night. He went hunting with the rest of the family," she stated softly. I looked at her to see she was gazing out the window, a look of sadness hidden on her face, causing my heart to drop.

"You didn't go with them." It wasn't a question.

She shook her head, and it was then that I noticed her eyes were a golden color. "I fed a while ago. There's no need."

I nodded in understanding, and with a single question in mind, I struggled to allow the words to escape my mouth. "Did… Edward send you?" I murmured, clenching my fists as I realized I said his name differently. Would she notice? "To watch over me?"

She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes, and I had the sudden urge to just hold her hand, to comfort her. "No," she replied, and practically read my mind when she took my hand in hers, the cold feeling of her granite skin sending a wave of relief over me, along with surprise. "Which is actually unusual, as you know. It was my own decision. I wanted to see you."

I smiled, warmth spreading over my chest at her words, and I squeezed my hand, knowing she probably couldn't feel it. "You had a vision, didn't you?" I asked, blushing as I said this, looking at our folded hands.

"Uh huh," she smiled. "You don't have to be afraid to ask, Bella. I love cuddling with you."

My heart began racing at a mile per hour. "You don't have a problem with this?" I uttered, mentally cursing myself to stop with the anxiety. It was likely she could hear the pulsing of my blood increasing in speed. "I mean… with your thirst, and all?"

She shook her head, wrapping her arm around me once again, and I immediately felt relief. "Not at all," she muttered. "Well, not as much as it used to. I suppose I've been around you too much that I'm learning to resist your blood. That, and I couldn't possibly hurt you. I would never forgive myself."

Her words caught my attention, clinging to my mind like a first crush would. I knew they should have had no meaning to me, yet I couldn't resist. If she killed me… I shuddered at the thought… would she regret it after years of avoiding human blood? Or because she drank the blood out of someone she loved?

"You smell nice," she said, breaking me out of my reverie. "I've always noticed, but it stands out more right now. I suppose it's because you just bathed."

I blushed. "Thanks," I shifted against her body a bit to smell my own hair, just for something to do. "I forgot to ask you," I began, fumbling with my fingers as I thought about how to phrase this. "Where were you while I was in the bathroom? I mean, Charlie was downstairs…"

"I have my way of hiding. I'm a 'bloodsucker,' after all," she replied, humorously, mimicking Jake's nickname for their kind. "If it makes you feel better, I didn't see anything. I was merely stopping by, so I wouldn't frighten you if you caught me in your room."

"But…" I began, uncomfortably. "You had a vision, didn't you?" I actually just thought about it, when Alice decided to come over and I had made a snap decision to take a bath. And since she sees the future of those who make decisions… "I don't mind, really. It wouldn't be your fault if you did."

"Possibly…" she sighed. "You probably already know my answer. I don't want to make you anymore uncomfortable," but then she paused, her grip around my waist loosening. "I also wanted to ask you something, if that's alright?"

I chuckled lightly, shaking my head. "Silly vampire," I joked, scooting myself back so I could lie down. "Do you honestly think I could say no to you?"

She followed my league, a smile spreading across her luxurious lips. She turned her face toward me and moved a bit closer, giving me a full view of her beauty. "Well, that depends. You always say no when it comes to shopping."

I rolled my eyes. "That's different."

"Oh," she raised her eyebrow. "How so?"

I laughed, a real one, and it was then that I realized that I haven't laughed like that in so long. Of course, it was only Alice who could make it happen.

"Stop changing the subject." I elbowed her lightly, hoping I wouldn't end up hurting myself again. "What did you want to ask?"

Her smile disappeared almost immediately, and so did the happiness I felt. It hurt me to see Alice like this, especially since she's normally a very ecstatic person. But what was worst was I didn't know why she was upset.

She hesitated, which was clearly uncommon for a vampire. It was almost… human. "You know I care about you, Bella. And I'm worried…"

I shifted my body so I was staring straight at her, focusing on a strand of her raven black hair that hung out, covering a part of her face. Without thinking, I placed my hand on her angelic face and tucked it behind her ear, feeling the heat and spark of electricity flow through my fingertips. My breath caught in my throat, and I instantly pulled away with an infinite number of profanities flowing through my mind.

She looked at me with confusion clearly marked, and I wasn't sure whether it was because I touched her or I pulled away.

"Worried about what?" I asked, closing my eyes as I mentally prayed that a blush wouldn't appear, though I knew it didn't matter. She could smell the blood rushing through my veins.

"You're upset." It wasn't a question, and she clearly wasn't talking about my emotions at that moment. "I've seen you. I've noticed for a while now, ever since…" she paused. "Ever since Edward asked you to marry him."

Her reply caused another moment of heartache. There was no sense in lying to her. She already knew. "Is it obvious?"

My voice came out broken, cracked, and I realized I was shedding tears. I couldn't cry. No. I've tried so hard not to for the past weeks, and tearless sobs were all I have achieved. I couldn't break it now. Not in front of Alice.

I felt her cold hand slide down my back, up and down, comforting me, and in an instant, a single tear rolled down my cheek. So much for a record.

"It's alright, Bella. You don't have to hold it in. Cry all you want. Just let it go," her whispered words were calming, peaceful. Though the tears came to a halt, the emptiness never did.

"You should know me by now. I may not be Jasper, but I know whether you're upset or not," she murmured, attempting to get a laugh out of me. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

I smiled ever so slightly, taking in Alice's words. If only I knew what was wrong with me, I probably wouldn't be feeling this way. How much more pathetic could I be?

"I don't know, Alice." And it was actually the truth coming out of my mouth. "I know I'm being pathetic, and stupid. But I really don't know what's going on. I'm so confused."

She looked at me, sympathy her clear emotion. "Don't talk about yourself that way, Bella. You aren't pathetic," she said and, with a pause, asked, "Are you in love with my brother?"

I could have sworn my entire body twitched at her words, and I looked at her as if she were crazy. How could she ask that question? Is it really that difficult to tell whether or not I'm head over heels about Edward? Of course I was in love with him! Edward was perfect. My love, my heroin, my life! I wanted to be with him forever, everyday of forever. An eternity…

An eternity.

… And yet, why couldn't my heart agree with this simple fact?

"I don't know." I looked back at Alice's calm face, expecting her to leave me, to find me useless now that I admitted the truth. A worthless human. I was losing my love for Edward Cullen. It wasn't the same. I didn't love him as I used to. How could - "Alice…" my voice was a whimper of fear, torn and broken. "I'm scared."

Her hand continued to stoke my back, gently as she attempted to calm me down. "Shh… it's okay, Bella. It's okay," she would say, even though it wasn't okay. "It isn't your fault. It happens, and nothing you say or do will change mine or my family's mind."

"What am I-"

She placed a single finger on top of my lips, silencing me. "Try not to think about it. Not yet."

I remained quiet. Midnight was approaching, and I couldn't conjure up the courage to move. I was afraid, terribly afraid that Alice would leave if I let go. And it was stupid, really, because if she wanted to leave, she would have done so already. It didn't take much strength for a vampire to break away from my grip. A mere human's.

"What happened?" I murmured gently, a break through the silence. It was painful now, like a hole in my chest, only it went on forever. And it wasn't something that could be mended. I had promised myself long ago that he was all I needed, wanted, all I could ever love. And now… now it was all gone.

I felt her petite body shrug beside me, followed by a quiet sigh. "People fall out of love," was her reply. "It's heartbreaking, really. But it's life."

I looked up at the ceiling and pressed my teeth to my lips, wondering. "And you and Jasper?"

"Jasper and I," she repeated, almost carelessly.

"Yes," I muttered, unable to conjure up what I was supposed to say. "It's going well?"

"Hmm…" She mumbled, turning slightly to pick up a photo of me on my nightstand. She smiled. "Curious, are we?"

I nodded, weakly, and stared up at the picture she held, gaining the urge to snatch it and stuff it under my pillow. I despised having to look at how plain I was in the mirror. A frozen moment of it was even worst.

"I thought he was my life. But he was never the same after he… left," I continued, at a slower pace, suddenly remembering my mom's words. "I guess I was always too young to know what love is. But what you and Jasper share…"

"Love is complicated, Bella."

"It can't possibly be complicated for you."

"We have our share of problems, but I suppose every relationship does." Her tone contained a hint of sorrow, and I immediately supported myself with an elbow to look at her.

"I love him," she went on. "I always had, ever since the day I first had a vision of him. And as you may know, things change as time passes." She paused to set the frame back in its place. "An eternity may pass and it's very likely I would still have feelings for him. But that doesn't mean this bond we have will stay strong."

"Alice, I-"

"It also doesn't mean a love filled relationship can't last forever, especially when you really do have forever," she interrupted, calmly. "Because it very much can. You just have to find the right person."

I listened to her words intently, pondering them, a side of me knowing she wasn't just talking about herself. I couldn't say I wasn't surprised, because I wasn't. Shocked was more like it. And it saddened me even more to think of a relationship I once thought was full of love and care to actually be falling apart.

Remaining silent, I refused to allow the conversation to carry on.

I sighed, having drifted away from thoughts involving Edward and gazed toward the window as the moon casted a glow across the sky. It was actually nice to have someone who could understand you, to feel some of the pain you felt; a relief to appear depressed without stating a reason why. And then, with hesitation, looked at Alice after what seemed like an eternity.

Our eyes immediately locked, and my heart was suddenly racing against my chest as if it were about to burst. It frightened me, for some odd reason, to gaze intently into the eyes of Alice, so gorgeous, mixed with the usual golden colors. They looked so much like Edward's.

But they were different, as well, full of life, though I knew that wasn't possible, considering what she was. And it was then that I admired her face, so small and pixie-like, but perfect and inhumanly beautiful. Her pale, flawless skin could never compare to my own and her nose, straight and simply perfect. I felt a hint of envy, though it was instantly replaced with a jolt in my stomach as I struggled to breathe.

Why haven't I ever noticed how stunning Alice was? She was so… perfect. Nothing else could possibly sum up who she was.

And it hit me so hard, this unbearable urge to reach out and stroke her face, anything to feel the cold, granite skin tingle beneath my fingertips. My hand, trembling with every movement, made contact with her short, spiky hair, soft and silky within my touch.

She watched me quietly, motionlessly, and I took the silence with gratitude to lay my hand upon her face. I let out a slow, shaky breath, listening as my heart continued to thud violently against my chest.

My thumb caressed the dark, purple circles under her eyes, and I insisted on letting go as the stinging began, as if there was some kind of electricity involved. But never in a million years could I bring myself to do so.

The ends of my fingers trailed across her cheeks, cool and warm at the same time, to her nose and finally, to her lips.

I pulled away at that moment, realizing with growing curiosity that I wanted to feel them beneath my own. My breathing became difficult to control, uneven and shrill, and it wasn't until I closed my eyes that I realized I was moving closer to her.

I could feel her breath stroke across my cheek, my hand rest around her neck. So close, and as each second ticked by, the anxiety merely grew, as well as the fluttering in my stomach. It was as if there was an undeniable connection, a rope pulling me in. My lips barely touched hers before I felt a whish of wind, followed by the sensation of empty arms.

Panic instantly washed over me at the thought of her leaving, and I sat up, eyes wide. "Alice?"

I gazed at her as she began rummaging through my closet across the room, her back to me as she piled up a pair of pajamas in her arms.

"It's getting late," she stated, with no hint of emotion in her voice whatsoever. Though the moment she turned to me, I could see the fear hidden in her eyes.

"Here, take them," she handed me a pair of silky pants, a matching shirt and underwear. "And go to the bathroom. Charlie's asleep."

I didn't know what to possibly think. Just the thought of what could have happened just moments ago intrigued me like nothing else had before, and then the thought of her leaving…

"Please don't do," I said as she walked past me.

"I won't. I'll be right here when you get back." A spark in her eyes was all it took to convince me. "I promise."

I nodded and ran to the bathroom, quickly changing into the pajamas, and hesitated before deciding on brushing my teeth. The hallway was dark, and I knew Charlie had really gone to sleep.

I skidded back to my room, a side of me unsure if Alice had kept her promise, but I ended up sighing in relief as I closed the door behind me.

It was quiet, an uncomfortable silence between us, and it was then that I knew I had done something wrong.

"Go to sleep, Bella," she said softly. It wasn't much of a command.

"I'm not tired." I took a step closer, uncertain with what to say.

"You will be," she stated certainly. "I can assure you."

It was awkward, and I wanted nothing more than to apologize and forget everything. But as I slowly made my way to bed, I knew that would be impossible. This couldn't be forgotten. Not by me, at least.

"Alice, I'm-"

"There's no need to apologize," she said, honestly. I grabbed onto her as she shifted in her seat, and, giving me a reassuring look, went to turn the light off, reappearing by my side in less than a second. "I promised I wouldn't leave you. Why don't you ever believe me, you silly girl?"

I laughed at her response, though it was a heartless chuckle. Nothing she said could possibly comfort me until she knew, until she forgave me.

I turned around to face her, feeling all the more nervous. "I can't sleep unless you forgive me."

It was too dark to see her reaction. All I knew was that she ran her fingers through my hair, quietly whispering, "There's nothing to be forgiven."

I pondered her words, a blush creeping up my cheeks continuously as I remembered what I had almost done. Just the idea of it was… appealing to me. Arousing, in fact.

"I love you, Alice," I murmured quietly into the night, surprising not just her, but myself. Her body tensed up beside my own and I suffered through the million conflicts going through my head. Did I just say that?

Saying these three words to your best friend wasn't a big deal, of course. What it meant exactly was.

I flinched as I felt her cold lips on my cheek, sensing her hesitation as she stayed there longer than necessary. And I felt them again as she placed them on my own. It was a sudden action, something I had not been expecting, but I relished this ecstatic moment as I pulled myself closer, my heart thundering in the silence.

It was a tender kiss, gentle, her hard lips moving against mine with care while I laid my hand on her neck. She wrapped her fingers around my hand, pulling away.

"I love you, too, Bella," she sighed, and I could hear the smile on her lips. I cuddled closer to her, smiling as well as I held onto her hand and intertwined my fingers with hers. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight," I murmured, unable to control the amount of excitement erupting through my body.

I closed my eyes and for the first time in a long time, drifted off into a peaceful slumber. And it was then that I was sure about one thing…

I was falling in love with Alice Cullen.

* * *

**I just have two words - Belice rules.**


End file.
